(Note: I’ve been sitting on this post since mid-February. I finally felt like I was ready to share it.)
Let me start by saying that I don’t like to be deceived so I always want to be honest with everyone I come in contact with – including you, my readers. I have only written about incredibly personal topics twice – miscarriage and jealousy. But the thing is, I’ve been insincere with myself for quite awhile now and it’s about time I come clean. So here it is:
I am fat.
Okay, so it’s probably not nice to say that about myself but I’ve been overweight since James was about 6 months old. I didn’t lose all the baby weight like I’d heard I would by breastfeeding. Instead, I kept packing on the pounds. It didn’t get any easier to lose that weight after Colin was born. I started to despise looking at myself in the mirror and I never wanted my photo taken but I also didn’t have a single ounce of motivation to do anything about it.
I can’t believe I’m sharing this picture for the world to see. I think it’s a disgusting image of me.
A few years ago, I started walking once a week with a friend. It’s a fantastic four miles with even better company, but the weight was still there. Sometime around July 2017 I started feeling like I might think about doing something to get rid of all this excess weight. In December 2017 I found the motivation to actually do something about it!
Goodness, I sure wish I could think away the weight!!
Here’s where I hold myself accountable:
My goal is to lose 75 pounds over the next eight months.
What’s my reasoning? I have a laundry list of reasons but these are the two biggies:
- I’m overweight and it’s not healthy. I want to be around for my family for as long as possible and that’s not likely if I continue down this path.
- I want my self-confidence back! Looking in the mirror sickens me. I want to be able to take a picture without re-taking it a zillion times or pointing out the ‘horrible’ parts.
Losing weight was not on my list of resolutions for 2018 but, in the back of my head, I knew it would had to be a big part of the year. In fact, my goal for the year was to just BE – be happy, be present, be adventurous, etc. – but the more I thought about it, the more I wanted to feel like the person my husband married. I still want to BE, but in a thinner, healthier way.
So, in January, I started getting serious – I increased my water intake, tried harder to hit the 10,000 step mark and even tried OrangeTheory Fitness. In February, I swore I was going to join a gym. That hasn’t happened (YET) because I’m still trying to find my courage to commit to that! But I maintained my higher water intake, joined a motivation Facebook group, installed (and purchased the paid version of) the MyFitnessPal app on my phone, installed a free workout app, started making it a priority to hit the 10,000 step mark, cut out a TON of sugar (mostly Coke) and started really watching what I was eating.
I’m starting to feel a little better about myself but my self-esteem is still minuscule.
I’ll tell you what, it’s not easy but it’s worth it. I understand that losing 75 pounds in eight months sounds like a lot but I’M WORTH IT!
I hope you’ll follow along as I try to do better – for myself, for my health & self-esteem and for my family!
You can do it! Sometimes it’s so hard getting personal, but I think it helps us along the way!
Sara, I echo so much of why you say. I lost 65 pounds in 2010-2011. I got pregnant in April of 2011 and can’t lose it again. I’ve been trying this year and lost 6 pounds in January and am stuck. But if I’m honest I’m not trying as hard at the moment. It’s so hard to feel worth it when I look in the mirror.
On a side note look into DDP Yoga. It’s amazing. I love how it makes me feel and how easy it is to start and how he lays out modifications.
You got this cuz. ❤️
You CAN lose it again! Find your motivation & ignore the mirror!
You are more confident than you give yourself credit. You are looking great. We are proud of you!!! Keep it up, you are awesome.
Love you, mom!
Sara, you’ve got this, girl!! Backing you on this journey and know you will get to where you want to be.
P.S. The Feb 2018 is proof of that ♡♡♡
Big hug!!
Philippians 4:13
Thank you, friend!
YOU are already doing it!!! Keep it up!!! I know you’re going to make your goal.
Thank you! Once I reach this goal, I hope I have a fraction of your confidence! You are awesome!
Very Proud of you, I know you can do this for you and your family.
Thank you!
You are gorgeous and I love your honesty and courage, Sara. I’m right there with you on this weight loss journey and we can help and encourage each other!
Weight loss is tough but necessary for us to become even healthier people and parents (setting a great example for our kids). But it’s a lot tougher to become an all-around amazing person and you’ve already got that going for you! What really matters most is that you have an incredible heart and you are a beautiful person and a fantastic, kind friend. Love you!
I love you, dear friend!
you look amazing! I need to do it too, its so hard to get started
Right there with ya… except my goal is 100 lbs “this year”. For me I know it’s diet and mindless snacking so I’m doing ideal protein. Down 14 lbs since I started Jan 27th. I say this to say- it’s hard. You aren’t alone. I’m here for you. You ARE worth it.
What’s ideal protein? Tell me more. I NEVER hit my protein goal for the day. You are worth it, too! <3
Good luck with your weight loss journey. I have been trying to lose weight for 4 years and it is just not budging.
Sarah your honesty is amazing! I think we all have to have that Aha moment for our health to really get motivated I had mine almost a year ago, after 3 kids and becoming a stay at home mom I was so out of shape and unhealthy , a 5K fun run for my kids school helped me realize that and now I’m down 53 pounds in almost a year. You can do this! Remember you will fall off the wagon, maybe you’ll have ice cream or cookies or half a pizza- but one bad meal won’t make you fat, just like one good meal won’t make you healthy. Health is a journey, a lifestyle change, but the more you do it the easier it gets!
That’s fantastic! Thank you for sharing your story!
You will have to let me know your tricks! I have been trying to get rid of 60lbs from being pregnant the last two babies back go back. You look GREAT Sara, keep up the amazing work!
So far, I’m just walking and using MyFitnessPal to track what I’m eating.
I’m in the same boat as you. I need to lose weight but I just have no motivation. Hopefully when it warms up a little I can get outside and moving more often. *You look great by the way! 🙂